Life is cruel, conniving and heartless companion at times. It at times holds our vision with such cold hands that a shiver runs down the spine, and while try to turn our eyes away from it, it refuses to let go of the strangle it holds us in. In moment as those, we close our eyes and want to believe that every thing is well.
There could be some merit in that when one looks are some momentary misfortune has befallen on to our being, as would be advocated by the proponents of positive thinking. The gang of glass-half full, but then it does not work and at its worse, works at its negative, when the problem at hand stems from a rot which is deep within. Symptoms which pokes and hits you with brutality is just the pointer which attempts to point to something which has derailed much deeper. In situation as that, escapism is of no use, although to evaluate it with some more seriousness, it is in sheer stupidity of ours that we presume our escapist attitude, our cowardly attempt to flee into a fantasy world where we are surrounded by all benevolence around us and where we exist as an omniscient and all-powerful soul, to mean the same as "Positive Psychology" or positive re-enforcement.
This is an absolute fallacy. To make a mistake or to err is human, but to continue to err and imagine that ills in life which gather around you on account of the error, will fade away out of sheer boredom on their own, or that you can wish it away with a strong will power, is stupidity of the highest order. Positive psychology does not meet that when you make a mistake, or when you are in a mess, sometime not on account of your own doing, like loss of health, job, love etc., you ought to believe that every thing is fine. Sometime you might want to believe that, to support a fragile mind which is unable to cope up with the overall failure that your state is into, but it will offer no resolution and eventually when you get tired of fantasizing, against everyday dose of reality, you will fall with an even harder thud, as floating in a your imaginary world of playing either a victim of fate or imaginary success, you would have made no real attempt to improve on the state that you are in.
I have had my own share of pitfalls, which left such scars on my thoughts that I do tend to at times float in an imaginary world, where I no longer need to prove my love-worthiness to my parents and I am loved anyways, where I am rich enough to go out tomorrow to buy a house of my own to live tomorrow, where I am at the very least, sagacious enough to know that how I can get my finances or health in order and act on that knowledge. Imagining has not helped me this far, I lull myself into believing what I imagine would be a nicer world to live into, and I wake up with dreaded nightmares only to realize that I am every time waking up to a harsher truth, every time my cocoon of fantasy is hit by a small brush of reality. If my health is not good, by imagining otherwise whether or not it was an well-deserved or undeserved calamity, my sugar level will not come down, my LDL will not go up; though it will maybe, help me survive little longer than immediately drowning into despair: the real resolution can only happen by accepting the state with absolute objectivity, unmindful of the pain that it brings and acting on it. All problems in life are handled by most in three different ways:
First will be :
- I have a problem
- This is bullshit, there is no problem, it is imaginary problem
- I want to do nothing about it.
Result: Problem aggravates, builds on itself till it kills you.
Second is:
-I have a problem
-I believe there is a problem.
- I am doomed because there is a problem which is beyond me, I can do nothing about it.
Result: My depression kills me before the problem does.
Third is:
-I have a problem
- I take the problem as a reality, am crushed by the weight of truth, but I have no excuse. It happened because of me or sheer spontaneity of the circumstances. I decide to find, under the circumstances what best can be done about it.
- I act on it and Start to do something about it, from this moment.
Result: I either resolve the problem, or die busy trying to resolve it, either way the pain in the process is resolved.
I do not believe there is any other way, and I do believe, that the last one, which I would call facing the demons is the only way to resolution of the question which Life puts in front of each one of us.
There could be some merit in that when one looks are some momentary misfortune has befallen on to our being, as would be advocated by the proponents of positive thinking. The gang of glass-half full, but then it does not work and at its worse, works at its negative, when the problem at hand stems from a rot which is deep within. Symptoms which pokes and hits you with brutality is just the pointer which attempts to point to something which has derailed much deeper. In situation as that, escapism is of no use, although to evaluate it with some more seriousness, it is in sheer stupidity of ours that we presume our escapist attitude, our cowardly attempt to flee into a fantasy world where we are surrounded by all benevolence around us and where we exist as an omniscient and all-powerful soul, to mean the same as "Positive Psychology" or positive re-enforcement.
This is an absolute fallacy. To make a mistake or to err is human, but to continue to err and imagine that ills in life which gather around you on account of the error, will fade away out of sheer boredom on their own, or that you can wish it away with a strong will power, is stupidity of the highest order. Positive psychology does not meet that when you make a mistake, or when you are in a mess, sometime not on account of your own doing, like loss of health, job, love etc., you ought to believe that every thing is fine. Sometime you might want to believe that, to support a fragile mind which is unable to cope up with the overall failure that your state is into, but it will offer no resolution and eventually when you get tired of fantasizing, against everyday dose of reality, you will fall with an even harder thud, as floating in a your imaginary world of playing either a victim of fate or imaginary success, you would have made no real attempt to improve on the state that you are in.
I have had my own share of pitfalls, which left such scars on my thoughts that I do tend to at times float in an imaginary world, where I no longer need to prove my love-worthiness to my parents and I am loved anyways, where I am rich enough to go out tomorrow to buy a house of my own to live tomorrow, where I am at the very least, sagacious enough to know that how I can get my finances or health in order and act on that knowledge. Imagining has not helped me this far, I lull myself into believing what I imagine would be a nicer world to live into, and I wake up with dreaded nightmares only to realize that I am every time waking up to a harsher truth, every time my cocoon of fantasy is hit by a small brush of reality. If my health is not good, by imagining otherwise whether or not it was an well-deserved or undeserved calamity, my sugar level will not come down, my LDL will not go up; though it will maybe, help me survive little longer than immediately drowning into despair: the real resolution can only happen by accepting the state with absolute objectivity, unmindful of the pain that it brings and acting on it. All problems in life are handled by most in three different ways:
First will be :
- I have a problem
- This is bullshit, there is no problem, it is imaginary problem
- I want to do nothing about it.
Result: Problem aggravates, builds on itself till it kills you.
Second is:
-I have a problem
-I believe there is a problem.
- I am doomed because there is a problem which is beyond me, I can do nothing about it.
Result: My depression kills me before the problem does.
Third is:
-I have a problem
- I take the problem as a reality, am crushed by the weight of truth, but I have no excuse. It happened because of me or sheer spontaneity of the circumstances. I decide to find, under the circumstances what best can be done about it.
- I act on it and Start to do something about it, from this moment.
Result: I either resolve the problem, or die busy trying to resolve it, either way the pain in the process is resolved.
I do not believe there is any other way, and I do believe, that the last one, which I would call facing the demons is the only way to resolution of the question which Life puts in front of each one of us.
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